Monday, September 28, 2009
Entertainment Speech -Self Critique
Please post your self critique for your entertainment speech here. I am looking for a deeper and more detailed critique than submitted this summer. The speech critique must include strengths and improvements. It must be a minimum of 200 words. Do not just focus on your delievery. I want to hear about your content too. Please identify the element of humor techniques that you incorporated in your speech. How successful were these techniques? What would you do different? Or, the same if you performed this speech again? BE sure to view your youtube clip before positng and refer to it in your post.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
18 comments:
Overall, I think that this speech was probably my most successful attempt at achieving all the goals of the assignment. I used myself, others, the element of surprise, and pulling the switch to create a good amount of humor in my speech. I think my most valuable asset was the element of surprise. I think my pitch about the ‘chitty chitty bang bang’ was my best joke, and that the audience really found the novelty of the topic in the elongated joke. Actually viewing myself was an interesting experience. After watching the video, I realized the audience really could not see how nervous I really was. On the outside it looked like I was mostly calm and collected, but on the inside I was considerable shaky. I did not see any problems with the tone of voice I used, and I maintained a conversational style with my audience. However, my posture can use some improvement in my future speeches. I had my hands on my waste for the majority of the speech. Although this was a casual stance, I could have used my hands to effectively gain more esteem points.
The major flaw in my entertainment speech was my conclusion. I signed my speech off with “That’s all I have for you guys, and a thumbs up”. The proper way to conclude an entertainment speech is by using a memorable statement that ties all your topics together, or by “pulling a switch” on a theme joke that you had been building up. My conclusion came off as tacky and lazy, not clever and memorable. However, I did try to think of a good last one liner at the end, but felt pressured and was not able. I should have had one ready, but foolishly believed it would come to me naturally as I finished my speech. I felt as though the body and the ending portion of my speech were considerably less rich in humor as the beginning. I probably could have made it better by more effectively anticipating my audience’s responses. I was a little thrown off when they found some of the things that I said funny, and others not as humorous.
I really want to improve my posture, and hand motions in my next speech. I want to use my hands to compliment my words, and not to insinuate I am nervous or feeling unenthusiastic about my topic. My posture should remain confident and poised the whole time, and not unsure and jittery. I need to make major improvements on my introductions and my conclusions for my persuasion speech, because they are detrimental in creating the sway of my persuasion. Right off the bat, I want to meet all the objectives of good introduction, and at the end I want to leave a memorable statement without rambling on. I am not going to use any note cards in my next speech, because I feel as though their presence takes away from my credibility. In my last speech, I relied too heavily on the note cards and lost a lot of points not only on my grade but also with my audience.
During my speech I think I have somewhat improved my comfort in front of the audience. Although there is still room for improvement I think I am improving. Throughout my speech I noticed a few fillers but mostly when I would become “stuck” on certain topics I would begin to get tongue tied or start rambling on. I used lots of hand gestures which came in handy more than being very fidgety. Also my transitions were less than strong. My transitions consisted of “anyway’s” and “I don’t know’s” My strongest technique used was using myself, others, building bridges as well as my strongest, the element of surprise. Although I think the element of surprise was my strongest technique I could have used better timing to set up the comedy more. Although my speech seemed conversational when I got to the ending although I planned it out better in my room it seemed very shaky on camera, also that could have used better timing and I better set up to get the point across of what I was really trying to say and leaving a lasting impression on the audience. Generally I say there is improvement although I need to learn to better prepare. Preparing is the thing that is setting me back the most although I am working on that as well as my time managing skills to accomplish my goals in steps.
I presented my entertainment speech on Friday, October 2, 2009. My speech included myself, my family and my peers from EOP. In the speech I began with a greeting and opening up with a remark regarding to myself and what my presentation would revolve around within the opening remarks, immediately used one of the techniques, element of surprise, by making a subtle comment about what I was going to speak about. I then went on to establish my credibility with the audience by speaking about how we can learn much wisdom through our experiences. I referred to TV shows that were very popular when I was younger, on that note is what really brought the audience into the presentation. I built a bridge within each of my main points, and within my first main point I built a bridge from my first sub point to the second through referring to age and how wisdom carries on with age. I changed the peg of the joke by changing topics and relating them to myself. Then I really established my credibility with my audience by speaking about my experiences as a college student, which relates the most because it is present day. I then continued to build a transition by connecting experiences that I have and wisdom I personally gained to what I gained from my family. My most evident techniques that I used throughout a majority of the presentation were element of surprise with subtle comments that the audience enjoyed, changing the peg of my jokes, and building bridges from one main point to another through my connectives. I was able to keep a steady eye contact with my audience as well as use my actions to bring out the real humor behind my speech. I made use of props such as a sandal and belt to bring out part of my first main point. The video made it evident that my body language was strong throughout the presentation; however, it appeared that I moved too much throughout the presentation. I could have slowed down a bit because it seemed that some of the jokes were lost because of the pace I was moving at. At times, I did not give enough pauses between jokes to allow the audience to react. Other than that, I felt that my presentation was well rounded and besides minor pauses, lack of eye contact, quick pace and some minor pronunciations, I felt my speech was well done.
The first thing I noticed about my speech is the fact that I say so to start off my speech. Within my speech I used like, so, or umm 10 times in total. However, in this speech I seem the most relaxed and I hid my nervousness as well as I could. I used myself in the way that I incorporated my experiences on facebook into my speech and I also used other because I involved the whole audience right off the bat by talking about something we all use every day. I pulled the peg between my ideas within my points and also between my points. I also used the element of surprise with actual examples such as when I said “Stef is in stall three.”I liked my use of body language in my third point about the videos. However, my body presence has improved between my last speeches and now. I tried not to cross my legs and wobble around in front of the class and I used my hands to gesture to the audience much more than in previous speeches. I liked my intro because I used all the elements of an introduction. I had a fully developed beginning to my speech but the conclusion could have been much stronger. I need to improve on fully developing my conclusions for the next speech. I liked the way I built bridges between my thoughts within my three main points but my transitions between the points could have been stronger by building better bridges to flow from one main topic to another. I think if I were to do my speech over I would try not to use the words so, like, and umm and I would try to plus in natural pauses into my speech instead of using those filler words but I would keep the content of my speech the same with a stronger conclusion and better transition phrases between main points.
I feel as though this speech I felt most comfortable doing. Besides knowing the material because I was speaking of myself, and having so much practice in the summer, this speech was very relaxed. I used all five techniques which I believe made the class laugh with every element. Due to technical difficulties, my speech was not recorded on YouTube which makes this critique a bit harder. As usual, I do have to work on my stance which will be my main goal for the next speech in which we are assigned. I feel as though I conquered my habit of taking my anxiety out my using my hands while doing my speech. I think it flowed very well with the connectives I used. I was happy that I put the Pompton Plains one at the end, being that the class already knew about how I felt, and I used the element of surprise when I said “Welcome to Pompton Plains!”, just as I did in my speech in the summer. Although Professor McManimon said that my conclusion was done well, I was not fond of it. I think that I could have wrapped this speech up much better. In the beginning I was very nervous that not everyone would find things funny, because the class doesn’t know me like my closest friends do. But I do feel like they did enjoy it, more then I hoped for. It was also very different going the last day, as I usually get up first to do my speech. This both relieved some stress as well as caused anxiety for me as I watched everyone else. Overall, I think that I did very well and hope my next one is even better!
My entertainment speech was about the top seven things my friends tease me about. To start off I think I did a very good job presenting my speech. I prepared and I went over what exactly I would say to my audience to almost everyone that I know. I took their criticism as good and helpful feedback. When I did all my other speeches I did not even think twice about the criticism that my peers and professor gave. I took it too personal and that held me back a lot. This speech I made sure that I was confident in myself, which is funny because in this speech I made jokes to humiliate myself.
At first I did not like the fact that we were going on “youtube” . I thought that it would be embarrassing. But now that I look back on it I love that we were all recorded. It helped me realize my nervous habits. I had no clue that I was scratching my arm like I was. Another nervous habit I have is that when I do not know what to say next I stutter a little bit. I learned from watching myself and this will better help me in my future speeches.
My entertainment speech was definitely not my best performance but in many ways lots of improvement were made since the summer and more improvement need to be made in the semester. When I was delivering the speech, I felt very comfortable but unfortunately I swayed back and forth way too much which made me look anxious and nervous. The content of my speech was very good. The examples that I used were ones that the audience could understand and relate to. The techniques that I used in the speech was changing the peg, using myself, using other resources and the element of surprise. The only technique that I did not incorporate a lot if building bridges. If I found a good was to relate all the points, the speech would have flowed a lot better. The two things that I was lacking for content is a better introduction and conclusion. My introduction was too short and it jumped too quickly into the body of the speech. I should have had a better hook and transition. I will definitely take a look at my notes from the summer to build a better introduction for the next speech. I also did not like my conclusion too much. I could have incorporated another technique in the conclusion so that I would have ended with the crowd laughing and the cut off would not be so obvious. If I were to perform this speech again I would start with a funny hook (maybe changing the peg on Rider itself). I would find some way to build in transitions between each point/slide and I would build a conclusion based on the element of surprise. The conclusion would kind of summarize the speech and end the speech smoothly. Another thing that I would do differently is I would keep both feet planted on the floor and hold myself from swaying. I am glad that this speech was video taped because I would have never realized that I was doing it. Overall, I did very well in speech that I presented and I know that with every speech I perform, I will get better and better every time.
Since the very beginning of Intro to Speech and Communications class, I believe that I have improved drastically. I went from being completely shy and quiet to actually making a connection with the audience. Honestly, I thought I did terrible with the speech but as I watched myself, I noticed that the crowd reacted as I wanted them too and I articulated my words despite the fact that I have a lisp. I was making great eye contact and I utilized the power point successfully. I used myself, others, and element of surprise. I like when I used my hands to improvise a shot gun during my definition joke. I didn’t even realize that I had did it. I could improve on a few things. I didn’t notice that I was kicking my legs and moving around so much. It really takes away from the delivery. I would like to work on that as well as holding my poseur. I got lost in my speech at least twice and made it obvious. I need to learn to hide my confusion and not let it show and have back up plans for technical difficulties. I need to learn that the show must go on regardless of technical difficulties. Over all I’m proud with what I saw in regards to my information and the feedback from the crowd. In the future I don’t want to use note cards unless I really have to because I tend to get lost with them. I hope to do much better on my next speech by correcting my posture and my resilience to continue through a speech despite difficulties.
This speech was by far the most comfortable I have ever felt. Not only was it fun to prepare but it was fun to present. I think the whole class would agree with me on that one. Talking about myself and having a power point made everything so much more comfortable not to mention we are all already old pro’s from this summer! I feel as if I used all the techniques in my speech. It flowed from point to point very well and I had pictures to express every point I talked about. I think my speech topic was very easy for the class to grasp because they are all in the same situation as I am, a freshman! The whole class seemed to enjoy my speech and understood what I was talking about. I do not like the way I stand when I give speeches. I feel like its awkward and I defiantly want to think of a different way to stand for my speeches. Also, I tend to look at the power point more than the audience. For the next speech I defiantly want to make sure I am fully engaged on the audience the entire time. When I give my speeches I am always smiling which I feel makes the class feel more comfortable with me and feel like its ok to laugh, I think this also helped make my speech successful. My introductions and conclusions tend to be a little short so for the next speech I am going to try out more lengthy introductions and conclusions.
While I was watching my speech I noticed that I had some corrections that need to be made for my future speeches. I would not have known most of this if it were not for the recording. I am still having some difficulties and there are very apparent on the recording. Right off the bat I notice that I incorporate a lot of hand movements and gestures. The hand movements are not necessary for some parts of my speech. I feel that I use hand movement due to my nervousness. The hand movements and necessary movements are just a mechanism that I use to help me cope with my nervousness. My hand movements need work, but there were times when my hand movements and gestures were necessary in order to get my point across to the audience. I was on the topic about how my fear came about and I was telling a story. During that story I used movements and gestures that demonstrated the actions that happened in the story. Another critique are my use of “empty words”. Professor McManinmon always talks about “empty words” and how we should not use them during our speeches; they are not needed. The “empty words” just add confusion for the audience and they cause the audience not to not pay attention to the speech. I notice that I repeated the word “plenty” because I missed my thought, I used “ummm” a few times, and the phrase “and everything”. A technique that worked well for my speech was switching up my rate/pitch and pausing when necessary. I was conversational when I needed to be, mainly throughout the speech, but my pitch varied when it needed, as well. My pitch varied when I said “run”. I was describing what the group and I decided to do at the beach. I also had a pause before I shouted “run” with the hand gestures to reinforce my point. Another technique that worked for me was the power point. The power point incorporated many pictures that helped as an aid for my stories. If it were not for the pictures (sources) I am not sure that the audience would have been as entertained. My stories in combination with the sources developed the laughter from the audience for my speech. Another critique pertains to my conclusion. My conclusion did not leave a memorable statement and was very abrupt from my last story. I did not make a strong enough transition to the conclusion, nor did I develop the conclusion more. I rushed into the conclusion and I should not have because the conclusion sums up the whole speech. Overall I felt like my speech was executed well and meet the criteria, but there are still some places that need work. I need to work on the “empty words”, my unnecessary movement, and establish a more developed conclusion.
From what I can recall with memory I would say that this speech went pretty good. I would say that I have greatly improved with my overall pace and body movement while delivering. I still had a few comments about too many hand movements but for the most part I would say that my speaking skills have gotten better. There were certain areas in which I did a good job utilizing and incorporating the different entertainment techniques into my speech. When I delivered my introduction I was able to effectively use a bridge to connect my YouTube clip with my speech topic. I also did a great job of using both myself and others when I reflected upon my personal experiences throughout the body of my speech. I was able to give examples of scenarios that both my siblings and I had created because of silly decisions while being babysat. Vocally I was also able to maintain a constant connection with the audience by remaining enthusiastic while varying my tone and pitch so that I did not lose them.
Another thing I noticed which helped establish a great connection with my audience was that since I was not afraid to laugh at my own jokes things went a lot smoother during my delivery. This also helped me to keep a certain level of comfort while I was in front of the class. One particular technique which I think I did a pretty good job of building into my speech was the element of surprise. A specific example of this was when I told the story about how my siblings and I were playing with fire and I saved the fact that my sister got a “bald-spot” until the very end. This helped me build up a certain level of anticipation in the audience because everyone was wondering what happened. I also did a good job with the element of surprise when I waited until the end to tell the audience the “fool-proof excuse” that we had come up with to save ourselves, and the fact that the excuse made absolutely no sense made the situation even funnier.
Overall I think I did a pretty good job on using the techniques to the best of my ability. I was able to keep cool and stay focused throughout my speech. However, my introduction could have been a little more detailed which would have helped my speech greatly. Even though my entertainment speech went well there is room for improvement which I will definitely work on for our persuasive speeches.
Tiffany Ervin (2:20 class)
When I found out that we had to do an entertainment speech I didn’t know what I was going to talk about. I went though so many topics until I stopped paused and started to think about my life. What was funny about my life? Who were the people who always kept me entertained? This is when the topic of brothers are hard to handle came about. My brothers were always the people in my life who I go to whenever I needed a laugh but yet they were always the people who were the most annoying. This topic of my brothers became the perfect entertainment speech subject.
I began my speech by introducing that all three of my brothers and how they all attended Rider University. I told a story about how everyone always likes my brothers Edward and Jimmy but Andy is the person that people usually have a problem with. By creating this humor I was able to change the peg and get into my first reason on why brothers are hard to handle. The first example is that my brothers are way over protective. I had a power point with a picture of my brother Jimmy with a machete. As I was showing the pictures on the power point I believe that I was moving my hands a little bit too much. I need to know when I can use my hands to emphasize a point and when it’s too much. The next point was everything I have is theirs. I told a story about how my brother Jimmy likes scented items such as body wash and body spray. At this part of my speech I created the element of surprise by saying that Jimmy was using my body wash in the shower which caught the audience off guard and made them laugh. My third point on why brothers are hard to handle was caution, going to sleep first is not an option. I used the element of surprise once again by talking about how my brothers get bored and prank each other. I had a picture of Jimmy sleeping with shaving cream all over his head which is why you should never sleep first in the presence of my brothers. I believe at that point of my speech I communicated well with the audience because I laughed with them as I was pointing out the picture on the power point. My fourth point called everything is a joke I used myself where I was crying about losing money. Everyone in the audience knows how it feels to lose something so it was easy to make that point. But then I added that my brother told me that he hopes he finds the money that I lost which changed the peg from something that is not entertaining that becomes entertaining. In my conclusion I summarized my speech saying they are rude and annoying but they will always be the top three men in my life and I will always love them.
In my entertainment speech I believe that I connected with the audience well and used many of the entertainment speech elements. This was my favorite speech to perform because it was about people who I know so much about. I really think this my best speech so far.
In my opinion, the Entertainment Speech has to be my weakest one. Everyone had a different opinion though. Everyone loved my speech and the previous speeches I’ve done. What goes through my mind during a speech is beyond what people see. For this speech I had so many ideas for a topic. I went through at least three topics before I said I was going to. I still didn’t feel like my speech was going to be funny. I procrastinated in picking my topic and that’s when I got the idea to do my speech on my journey through Procrastination. The purpose of my speech was to Procrastinate throughout my whole speech until I said my purpose. It sounds like a clever idea now, but when I was constructing my speech, that wasn’t my intention. Throughout the speech I included the techniques I needed to deliver a great speech. I felt confident but at the same time I felt like I was pushing myself more than I usually do. It’s difficult to be funny on command. I have a personality that makes people happy and laugh, yet I found this speech difficult. I started the speech by telling the class of my latest procrastination act. I connected my story to the upcoming research of this speech and I continue with that chain of thought. Lastly, I talked about multitasking and time management which would have helped me with my procrastination problem. I concluded my speech with a memorable statement that was “Procrastinate now, don’t leave it for tomorrow”. I got the whole class laughing and it made me feel good. I really wish I had more humor in the beginning, but I developed character and humor to reach my conclusion and that’s what made my speech funny. I hope everyone enjoyed it as much as I did.
Unfortunately, I was unable to see my video on YouTube to use it for my critique but there are a few points that I would like to address about my entertainment speech regardless. First and foremost, my speech came off as humorous due to my use of the five humor techniques: Using myself, Using other sources, Pulling of the switch, Building bridges, and the Element of surprise. The element of surprise, though, was the richest part of my speech because the audience did not assume that I was going to put Christmas under a different microscope and expose it in a different light. Even though it was up for interpretation, I made sure that my message made it across to the audience by suggesting I was going to provide them with Christmas’s “friendly advice” and started off with my number 1, “Make sure to always wrap it up!” All of the other humor techniques came across very well except for the building of the bridges. Every time I transitioned into my next point, my bridge was weakly introduced. I am sure my audience was able to follow that I was entering my next topic, but I could have guided them by using stronger bridges. As for my posture and delivery, I feel I came off as very confident, conversational, and sure of my topic while providing a sarcastic and funny air about me that allowed for my audience to get comfortable with me and my topic. Also, my introduction included all four parts of an effective introduction and I had a strong conclusion with a memorable statement stating, “Say to Santa these are the things you didn’t know and remember: just let it snow, let it snow, let it snow,” that hit the audience with one last element of surprise. As for my entertainment speech, the next time I perform one I will be sure to improve my use of the humor techniques and level of nervousness. Last but not least, as for my persuasive speech that is coming up, I plan on keeping in mind the use of a strong introduction and conclusion, keeping a conversational tone, establishing credibility all throughout the speech, and strengthening my content as I did in my entertainment speech. Until next time!
On Thursday October 1, 2009 I presented my entertainment speech based on my vacations in Puerto Rico. All in all I feel this was one of my better speeches, I was more comfortable with myself and I actually smiled more which was one of the things that I had to work on from the summer. While reviewing my speech through youtube I noticed a few things that I noticed need to be improved. For instance, I noticed that I was rocking a little bit and playing with my hands. I also noticed that I need to make my voice heard a little more because I feel that I sounded hesitant. Another thing that I feel I need to work on is to have a better way of connecting my ideas, better introduction, and a more well-rounded conclusion. However, I do feel I have made a little bit of an improvement. For example, as I stated before I smiled a lot more in this speech than any other I have done. I felt as if I was able to make a true connection with my audience, good eye contact, and felt some sort of comfort while presenting my speech. As Professor McManimon had stated during class you could tell when it was that I began to feel more comfortable and relaxed. Overall, I fell that my speech was decent but it does need a few quirks to be fixed.
After viewing myself on YouTube presenting my entertainment speech I have come to notice my flaws and strengths. In the beginning of my speech I was moving my hands a lot and rocking back and forth which really served no purpose. I also begin to talk really fast and change my pictures quickly which really does not allow the audience to get the full affect. During my first story I use improper grammar, instead of saying she doesn’t or she does not I say she don’t. I feel as my transition into my second story could have been stronger. I feel as if I was rushing my speech just to get it done. Also my second story was short I feel as if I could of put a little more detail into the story to get more of a laugh from the audience . I feel as my pauses also could have made more of an impact but since I was speaking as such a fast pace I lost a lot of power in the punch lines. In my third and final story I also moved a lot but during the end of the story the video had froze so I was not able to see the rest of it. Although I was not able to see my conclusion it does not make a difference because my conclusion was weak. I was not able to finish the story with a bang how I wanted to. The only things I found that help me was how I mentioned others such as my grandmother, friends, and my brother. Also I was able to change the peg and use the element of surprise in the beginning and end of my stories. Although my speaking was not conversational, my smile brought some of that conversational element to it. Being able to watch myself showed me the flaws and strengths and I now know what to work on and make better. I will do better on my persuasive speech and fix all my flaws but keep my strengths.
To me, the idea of delivering a speech in front of a class was a challenge. During the summer, I learn to become more confident and it helped me improve my communication skills. Yet, the idea of making an entertainment speech was very stressful. I always said that I can never be funny. Then I realized that I was wrong. Preparing my entertainment speech was very fun and it brought up a lot of good memories. My topic was “ 10 things that only kids can get away with.” I use visual aid to support my topic. I believe that my power point helped me deliver my speech more smoothly. One thing that I noticed about my delivery was that I was a little nervous. But I have improved a lot with hiding my nervousness. For my next speech I have to be focus on my body language. I tend no move back and forth and that is distracting. I also need to practice how to work with visual aid, and not be looking at the power point while I am delivering my speech. I have elaborate a conclusion more clear. My conclusion was not very specific. With a proper conclusion my audience could realize when my speech will end.
I was very proud with the way my speech turned out and how it was presented. Successfully using the 5 elements of humor, I was able to obtain the classes full undivided attention. This comedic speech was the best I have ever done and I have thanks to all the critiques I received. My main problem was the eye contact from the audience and my powerpoint. To often I would look at my powerpoint instead of keeping eye contact with the audience. As a result, I would lose a lot of their interests. This time around, I worked especially harder on keeping my eyes fixed on the audience, and as a result I was able to keep the audience focused on me the entire time. What I would really wish I could fix is my posture when I am giving my speech. I never knew I did this but from observing myself on the uploaded video on youtube, whenever I would talk with my hands my posture would slouch forward. I do not believe it made a big deal in my performance or let alone even noticeable, but for next time I would like to correct this and keep a nice, even posture all through out. A big problem I had in presenting my speech was the use of fillers. I did not notice until called upon, but I used the word “uhm” countless times through out my comedic speech. All to often I used this word to make up for my lack of words, instead of using an acceptable pause.
Post a Comment