Tuesday, July 22, 2008
PR Speech Critiques for 8:30 am class
Please post your critique for your speech buddy here if you are in the 8:30 am class. Be sure to use your feedback form as a guide. Remember, use details to support your comments. You have to back up your comments with enough details that the speaker has specific information to use in their next performance. Roughly, three strong strengths and three improvements would be the minimum needed in this post. Feel free to comment more if you choose. Remember, Feedback is a gift. Let's help each other be great speakers!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
20 comments:
Ashley Pichardo is my speech buddy. She presented today, July 22nd, 2008. Her topic was Wikipedia.
Ashley's introduction was strong. She had a great, catchy phrase and caught most of the room's attention.She definitely was clear with her information. She came across like she knew what she was talking about with great detail. This means she did her research. Ashley speaks very clearly and loud no matter how nervous she gets. Her tone stays even and crisp throughout the entire presentation.
Though she had much positive feedback, some of the things Ashley has to work on is learning how to conversate her speech more. She referred back to her index cards and the power point too much. The index cards are there just for a quick glance if you forget something. The presentation is not about lecturing, its more about sharing the information with a more conversational manner. Body language is very important. She didn't have much eye contact and her hands were swinging to much. Even though her voice is clear, she needs to slow down just a little. She has a clear and persuasive voice; slow down in order for the audience to grasp all of the information.
Citation is very important. I know it's sometimes hard to work it in as a sentence but you can't have information and not support it. Towards the middle you began citing the information but you have to remember to do it from the introduction all the way to the conclusion.
The introduction was strong, but the conclusion was rather weak. You don't want to be strong throughout the whole presentation and have no ending, the audience won't appreciate that.
Ashley just needs to take all the negative feedback and work on it for the next speech. If she works on it and keeps up the good work that she did today, I'm sure her next presentation will be an even bigger success.
*SORRY THERE MIGHT BE SOME SPELLING ERRORS BECAUSE THIS WAS TYPED ON WORD PAD AND HAS NO SPELL CHECK.*
Lisa Henderson is my speech partner. Her topic was California Wildfires.
Lisa's introduction was very captivating. She used pathos to express the lament of people caught in wildfires to draw the audience in emotionally.
She had great eye contact and she faced the crowd with confidence and assurance on her face.
She had good connectives that were strung together like the straw on a very tight rope. She didn't rely on her powerpoint to dictate he presentation and saved it for the audience only. This shows that she rehearsed and that she knew what she was talking about.
Her voice was perfectly projected across the room no one was in the vague about any word she said. Her diction was on an understandable level but still not too simple.
She lacked her citations in the pictures and her conclusion came too quick, almost without warning. She left out some important information due to nervousness which didn't stress worrying about getting the message to the listeners. Her presentation was informative but more on a story level. All and she did a very good job and has great potential
Destyne Pitts presented her topic “Homelessness in Atlantic City” today, July 22nd.
Destyne’s introduction was strong. She began with an attention grabber, involving the audience and ensuring that we knew what her topic was. She was very clear with her main points, stressing the facts. Her credibility was slightly weak. She added a citation in her intro and a small amount on her powerpoint, but not throughout the entire presentation.
Destyne’s vocal volume was perfect. She has a very nice speaking voice – it is not annoying or difficult to listen to in any way. She spoke at a very nice rate; I never felt as if I had missed anything. Her articulation was accurate. She spoke very clearly and pronunciation was excellent.
Destyne’s eye contact was maintained when she wasn’t looking at her powerpoint, which she spent a lot of time facing and reading instead of speaking directly to the audience. Her stance was turned towards the powerpoint while she was reading it instead of being turned toward the audience. Her hand gestures were subtle, and not over exaggerated and awkward.
Her use of language was not always correct. Some words weren’t the appropriate word to use, or were used in the wrong context. As I said before, her use of sources was lacking, both within the verbal presentation and the powerpoint. Destyne’s conclusion could have been stronger, but was still a summary of her points as it was supposed to be.
Due to her thorough amount of research, I was able to understand the details of her topic. She did a great job with organization and presentation overall. Plus, I really liked her skirt. :]
Destiny is my speech partner; she presented Homelessness in Atlantic City. Her opened up with a strong introduction that lured people in and grasped there attention. One way she did that was by using her power point and having a strong powerful image up on the screen. Her voice was very clear and concise it was easy to understand her; for example she did not mumble or stutter. She was conversational and that was a way for her to hold on to her audience because they can connect with her. For example she asked the audience “What do you think of when you hear Atlantic City?” It got the audience to talk back and join in her presentation.
But one of her weakness was that she relied on the power point but when she looked to the audience she had good eye contact. She also paced numerous times during her speech and her conclusion was short as she wanted to get over and done with. But over all I believe that she did well and with fixing minor mistakes she will be able to give a better speech that include sources because she did not present her sources.
Danielle is one of my speech and she presented very well and she got everyone atention in her introduction. She was very clear on her main point but she discussed them to quickly. She spoke very fast which made it a little hard to follow what the was saying. She was very vocal she spoke loud enough so everyone could hear her. One thing that she needs to work on is her eye contact. She barley made eye contact with the audience and she read everything from her power point.
Brandon Diaz was my speech buddy. I feel he presented Tom-Tom Navigation System.
Brandon started out really strong by connecting well with the audience. One thing I enjoyed about his introduction was that he immediately was “sticky”. He was able to encage the audience. His main points were clearly expressed; he was able to tell the audience about the features and functions in the Tom-Tom. He spoke very clearly and gave good information on his topic.
Even though, he was well organized, he forgot to add in his citations verbally as well as in his presentation. When he made eye contact it was well done, but there were times when he focused too much on the slide. Over all he did an excellent job in presenting his topic.
Cynthia is my speech buddy, She presented today, July 24th, 2008. her topic was...
Cynthia's introduction was very strong. She immediately used humor as an attention grabber. everyone in the audience was involved in her speech and wanted to hear what else she hd planned. She used humor in the sense of surprise. it wasn't forced.
Cynthia had clarity of all her main points because she researched her topic very well and also used humor which is a great technique because everyone remembers the funny ones.
Her stance was good, she didn't have too many gestures, which might have distracted her audience, and she had decent eye-contact.
overall i think Cynthia did a GREAT job for her first time speaking a conversational speech. But there are some things Cynthia should improve on with her next speeches. She should project her voice more. her tone was a little monotonous. She should also fake it until she makes it when she isn't quite sure of some of her citations.
Cynthia's conclusion was good. She left us thinking about everything that was mentioned earlier in her speech.
Anajessica is my speech buddy. Her topic was on Danica Patrick.
Anajessica’s introduction was excellent; her idea to incorporate a video into her introduction was brilliant. It captivated the audience in a mysterious manner. From the beginning of the video we couldn’t tell what the topic was about, it kept the audience in suspense. She asked questions to the audience, and from our stereotypical perspective, it did seem that a male was driving the car. To our surprise, it was actually a female.
Her eye contact was ok, it seemed as she became more nervous she tended to gaze in one direction. However with practice her nervousness will go away. Her voice was very clear, although I do believe she could’ve spoken slightly louder. Visually, her PowerPoint was great; her sources were cited, as well as the pictures. Overall, I feel that Anajessica did a great job on her speech, and I really enjoyed her topic.
Jeanine Roberts is my speech buddy.
Her topic was on Travelocity.
Jeanine had a pretty good intro, personally I enjoyed listening to her personal anecdote, I felt it made it a little more conversational and less dull. However Jeanine could work on her credibility a little more in the intro, by citing some specific sources.
Her main points were very clear. For the next time, Jeanine could try structuring her speech a little clearer. But the points she told were elaborated on very well.
The ease of following the message wasn't at its highest level, but it wasn't bad niether. For the next time so she can improve on this she could slow down and pace herself a bit more. Also the power point should follow the 6x6 so the audience could also follow easily through the use of visuals.
Jeanine diffinately needs to establish more credibilty. The power point also didn't have any correct citiations, so for the next time she can work on that and it will be great.
Visual contact was Jeanine's strongest quality. She had a nice control of the audience and exuded confidence through her face. Her stance however could have been a little more stronger. She stood on one foot most of the speech, so it gave a sense of off-balnce.
Language use was well, she articulated her self very well, the only thing I would liek to see improve in this area would be to have her slow down a little more and then it would be flawless.
Conclusion was solid. She lacked a memorable statement.
Overall, Jeanine did an awesome job for her first time, with the few minor improvements i commented on she should rock her next speech!
My speech partner was Nicholas. I think that Nick did very well, because when practicing the night before it was he struggled and stated that he would probably have to rely on his note cards a lot during his presentation. With great practice though he delivered a great speech today in which flowed very nicely and only glanced at his note cards once or twice. During the speech Nick spoke clearly while informing the audience about Starbuck's. He spoke with confidence which let the audience know that he knew his material. He sentence structure and connectors were great because it allowed his speech t flow well. He gave enough information about his main points so by the end we had an understanding of Starbuck's. The graphics in his Power Point acted as a good aid to help the audience follow the message he was giving. He began citing his work very well, while also drawing the audience in at the same time by asking if we knew what the initials of one of his sources meant. The use of questions throughout his speech, in my opinion, was a great way to keep the audience focused on him and what he had 2 say. Overall Nicholas did excellent, but for his next speech I would advise him not look at his Power Point so much because that takes away his eye contact from his audience.
Ashley Perez is my speech buddy. She presented on July 24,2008. Her topic was The Panda Crisis.
Ashley's Introduction was very unique . It was a very strong introduction. She was one of the only people who had great credibility in her introduction.
The had great clarity on her points. I was drawn to pay attention the whole time. The only advice i would have to give is to slow down a little.
I followed the message easily. She had a great conversational style voice. Her message was conveyed clearly and you felt bad for the pandas.
Her Volume could have been a tad bit louder. She had a great speed while she was talking, her pitch was perfect. And her articulation was also great.
Here eye contact was ok. she could have connected more with the audience. She kept on glancing up and lost the connection with the audience at times however she got the audience right back using her connectives.
Her stance could have been better. she looked nervous because you could see it through her body language. Gestures were reserved however once again you could see her nervousness through her stance.
She had great use of language. her sources were awesome she was one of the only people in the class that cited her sources. Which i was very proud of.
she also had a good conclusion, but it could have been stronger. Overall i thought her presentation was excellent and she had one of the best presentations in the class
Diandra is my speech buddy. She did her presentation based on Val Ackerman, former WNBA President.
Diandra's introduction was very strong. She got the audience involved right from the start and kept them involved. She also had a good sense of humor throughout the entire speech. Her sources were well cited. She had great eye contact. She was loud, clear and most of all she looked very comfortable. She knew what she was talking about, she was very well informed about her topic.
The conclusion, was very smart. Diandra found a way to basically sum up everything she spoke about in her speech and also showed her audience how her topic related to them. Consequently, it felt like her speech was benefiting them in some way and for some reason what she said was something you just had to know. Diandra did a great job and it was a presentation everybody enjoyed.
Neen3575 is Jeanine. I don't really have the hang of using the blogger yet but I think i got it now.
Jammar Lim was my speech buddy. His topic was on the Olympics.
It was apparent from the start of his speech that he was nervous and did not bounce back from this minor setback.Jammar made great points that did come through. He came across to me as someone that did understand his topics and his facts and that he did spend time researching his topic carefully. What truely apparent was that he did not spend enough time practicing so his comfort level was not at all strong in front of the audience. most of his problem was from lack of practice such as pace, clarity, and not no citation.
The induction was memorable so that in itself shows that it did not get the job done. His body was full of information from what i could understand of it. And hs conclusion was noot at all strong it lack structure and gave sense as if he gave up and his nervousness took over, it seem like he just could not wait to be done.
Im apologize for the tardiness I recieved incorrect information on the due date which I thought was Friday and it was not sent on Friday because of my lack of internet access. Once again tt was my mistake for not getting correct information and I will talk to you later on Monday with more details.c
Quanda Brinson is my speech partner. Her topic was Sirius Satelite Radio, which she presented on July 24th, 2008.
Quanda's introduction was good, because she started off with a good attention grabber. For example, I remember her asking about our troubles with the radio. It is important to have a good attention grabber if you want people to remember your topic. Nevertheless, her introduction included her main points, that she wanted the audience to know. Unfortunately, her main points did not have enough supporting detail for the audience to relate to.
Quanda has a very distinct voice, because it is strong, loud and not boring. You can hear the energy in her tone or voice. Although her voice was loud and clear, I feel as though she could have articulate her words better. Some of the words she pronounced were mumbled and I could not think of the word, she was saying. The volume was good, however she should slow down a little more for the next presentation.
Her eye contact was great. She looked at the audience, as though she was speaking to each individual in the class room. She had a good posture, nevertheless she was moving a her body just a little. Not that critical. She used sources in her presentation.
One thing I find Quanda needs improvement on is the citations. Throughout, her presentation there were only few citations included. I barely remember if she even did cite her information in the beginning.
Her ending was great. She concluded, how her topic on sirius radio, is a very beneficial and advanced technology.
In conclusion, I liked Quanda Brinson's presentation. She is an effective speaker, who will definitely do better on her next one, because she learns very fast.
Stephanie Ahenkora is my speech buddy. Her topic was Barack Obama.
Stephanie's introduction was very informative as well as persuasive. She had a great opening phrase caught the audience attention. She was very clear with the information that was provided. Her whole presentation was positive. Stephanie tone stumbled in the beginning but as her presentation went on she felt more comfortable.
Stephanie's clarity of main points was very informative as far as meeting the points of her topic. Stephanie message was definitely met as far as the audience understanding. Her volume was the same at all time and her voice was crystal clear.
Though she had plenty of positive feedback there were plenty of things he can improve on for the next speech. First she needs to pace more taking her time and relaxing. Stephanie's full attention on her topic giving a little bit more eye contact.
In the body of her presentation she did not cite her sources. Stephanie showed stuffiness use of language. In order to get more of a feel of her topic she used informational examples.
In conclusion Stephanie Ahenkora was great. She strives for the best to get her point across. Just a little more pronunciation on her words and taking her time though each part of her presentation she will be fine.
Lavenus was my speech partner, and she spoke about the Dell corporation.
Lavens,
Your final speech delivery was infinitely better than when we practiced =). Your introduction was really great and you read it clearly, also grabbing the audiences attention with a question which I thought was really good. Your main points were done very well and you stated them very clearly, using good connectives to link them all together and keep the audiences attention. You projected nicely as well so that everyone heard you and didnt have to struggle to understand what you were saying, which can often cause the audience to lose interest. Your body gestures were also much better than we practiced, you still looked up at the powerpoint a few times but it was still alot better than before. Just work on making better eye contact. I do the same thing though so we both need some work haha. Your use of language and vocabulary was done nicely, you used a few words and phrases to keep the audience interested. CITING. You had almost no verbal citing, thats the biggest thing you need to work on because it can be really important if youre doing a speech for a big corporation or something like that. Youre conclusion could have been stronger, we had already discussed that you needed a quote at the end but I guess you didnt have a chance to get to the library since it was late. So next time just remember to include that in your conclusion. Overall I think you did really well, especially for your first time, and Im looking forward to your next speech =).
Nick Tufo
Hello, Mrs McManimon, I seriouly do not know what is wrong with my blogspot account but I am unable to sign on. I wrote down my username and password after the first incident. I can long on to my google account, but blogspot won't allow me to submit my assignment. So I am once again e-mailing you my assignment, I am sorry.
Shiren Rizk is my speech buddy and she presented her speech on "Continental Airlines".
Her introduction was very strong.She began with a question which I thought to be "sticky." I also found her clarity of main points to be not so good. She used to many 'uhm' in her speech; therefore, I was very distracted from the message. It wasn't as easy to follow as it should of been. But her points were great.
I really liked her speaking voice. It was nice and soft and cute. She didn't have an annoying voice that people can't stand. She did not move to fast in her speech. She had good diction and articulation. I felt she needed to project more and strive harder to be really heard.
Her credibility was accurate. She used and stated her sources. Her citation was on point! This allowed her to come off as more believeable; therefore, I trusted her information.
She lacked eye contact. She looked down at the cards to much and really did not connect to the audience. Her use of language was scholarly, except the 'uhms'.
In her conclusion, she lacked confidence! It was as if she gave up and didn't enjoy sharing and informing her audiece at all.
ALl in all, her ability to give the information needed about the issue was successful.With more practive she will be greal in no time. She just needed to loosen up, stop letting her nerves effect her, and be more commited.
Post a Comment